You are a moron on wheels ...
When honking is considered your second language
When you park like this (thanks Keefieboy!)
When you consider the safety distance between the two cars on your left (or right) as "an opportunity"
When the driver ahead of you (presumably) irritates you, you do anything in your strength just to drive by him/her just to give the "LOOK"
When you've been force-moving away everyone in front of you on the far left lane for the past 15 minutes, just so that suddenly you slide across all lanes to grab that first right turn
When you use the hard shoulder to cut queues
When you, regardless to what speed you are at, what street you are on, always slow down to "check out what that police car is doing on the the other side of the road"
When you reduce speed from 120 to 40km just to change lanes
When you flash and honk at the car that's at least 1/2 km ahead of you, just because it moved into your lane
When on a highway, you decide to race and catch up with the poor sob entering from the right side and who is trying to pick up speed to match the highway's
When you think that once you turned on the blinker, its OK to cut everyone off
When your day is never complete unless you play a round of dodge-the-pedestrian-trying-to-cross-the-street game
When you consider driving with your baby in your lap as "cute"
When you block parked cars, lockup your car, and go watch a movie
When you make sudden turns without using the blinkers or reducing speed
When you park in handicapped parking spaces
When you switch on the front and rear fog lights all year round
When, while driving, you believe you can perform 2 of the following things simultaneously:
- sms someone
- talk on mobile
- read the paper
- write to the paper
- change cds/tapes
- check navigation/map/guide
- stick one leg out on dashboard
- fix hair, cap or ghutra
- play with toes
- apply makeup
- pick your nose
- scratch your "webos"
- scratch someone else's "webos"
- hold up the A3 size board that has your mobile number on, for that 'girl' in the car you have been chasing for the past 3 hours that you want to make "nice friendship" to
When you don't allow people to change lanes, though traffic is moving at 2 kmph
When you think you can give people the finger and get away with it (thanks Secret Dubai)
When you think you are "cool" because you are not wearing your seat belt
When going at 120kmph, you don't feel comfortable unless you can clearly read the fine print on the back windshield of the car ahead of you
When you only bully Sunnys, Corollas, Echos or any on wheels that are manufactured before 1990, and leave the mercs, beemers and other pimped rides - because you are being "a mature driver"
When you, after reading this post, feel that you relate to at least 3 out of any of the above.