Dubai Consumer Mirror: Keep the change

Sunday, May 06, 2007

Keep the change

Change is great.

Brings the best in me.

I thrive on change

But lately, I just want to settle down. No more please.

I hate this place.

I miss this place. I miss this freedom. To say thing, express my thoughts without being judged and irrespective to who you think (or already) know who I am.

Things haven't been that wow lately.

In Absolute terms, I have everything any man can wish for. A great wife and a beautiful child. A family that loves me and a career that growing faster than most of my peers (and managers in some cases). Touch wood!

But to me, its just not cutting it. I am not impressed. I am tired.

I've so much going on in my life, its taking me away from God. I am not spending enough time with him. I have some serious catching up to do with the All Mighty.

"how was your week end?" a colleague at work asked me the other day. Silence was my answer. I didn't know why.

He said that he looks forward for the weekend.

"I look forward to my weekend," He takes the wife and kids to the beach, meets his entire family over the Friday lunch and enjoys a good laugh or a wild game of cards.

"I look forward to it week in, week out." I nodded; hoping he doesn't notice my disregard to his holiday routine on one hand, and the brain energy i was gathering in a desperate attempt to see if my holiday agenda matches his.

Was I worrying about my next trip? next conference? Or was I worrying about this house that i still don't have phone or Internet access in. Do i need to pull another Gulfnews on this frigging landlord?

Then everything went blank. I think i was suffering what geeks call, memory overload. I can't think of anything else anymore.

The flickering elevator light grabbed more of my attention.

Why is it flickering? Did the elevator guy miss it? Maybe i can call people? What happened to my car maintenance? These fkers never called? I have to pay my phone bill? Did I pay my credit card bill this month?

I am failing to see any substance. I am loosing what ever shreds of creativity i have left in me. Life is becoming paper of "Things to do" check list.

So much i have to look after, too much to worry about, so much to pay for. And thanks, keep the change please.

Labels: Random

17 Comments:

I say you need a vacation. A real, actual one month of leave that you spend somewhere remote, away from anything that flickers.

Maybe the Seychelles, the Maldives or even the canaries..

By Mustapha, at May 6, 2007 at 9:17 PM
I feel for you dude, although I am not married and don't have any children. But I have a lot of responsibilities and so much to pay for and so many things to do, that I always have this constant amnesia and I have no idea of anything anymore.

Mustapha said it right - you need a holiday. And you need it bad.

By KJ, at May 6, 2007 at 9:41 PM
I think it's because the 2nd floor is for geeks.

By BuJ, at May 7, 2007 at 7:48 AM
Mory...you do need a break I think...A break that'll allow you to go back to basics...Just spend time with the family, relax, and deal with everything you have to deal with without having to worry about work and deadlines and people....

Take care of yourself..

By Dubai Sunshine, at May 7, 2007 at 8:25 AM
Thanks guys.. it was one of those posts where you just pour your heart out..

I just started writing whatever came our of my head and pressed 'publish'

I didn't even proof read what i wrote.

I wish I can take time off, but i can't really. Not this month at least. So, I might as well bite that bullet.

By moryarti, at May 7, 2007 at 1:50 PM
You have to set a date for that holiday, Mory, and make it happen - no matter what.

Set it for 3 months' time - and then you have a goal to work to, together with Mrs M and Baby M to spend some "quality time" together. By then, the Summer holidays for the northern hemisphere will be taking effect.

You'll find that by having a date blocked out for some R&R, you can then schedule your work to happen around those dates, and by communicating them early enough to your workmates, you'll find that they will also work to accommodate you.

You owe it to yourself.

BTW - Mauritius is fabulous and not as expensive as the Seychelles or Maldives! And there's always a room for you in Melbourne at that time - although it will be a little cold! :-)

By nzm, at May 7, 2007 at 2:17 PM
Sounds like burn out. As everyone said - best take a break before you get toasted for good.

By Sex and Dubai, at May 7, 2007 at 2:59 PM
Yo Mori! Good to see you still with us...even if you have resurfaced suspiciously close to the premiere of Spidey3 ...lol...

As much as I will echo the sentiments of others - get a holiday, stat - that still won't solve what is causing your long term ennui. Your pilot light has gone out, and without it everything will seem grey. Going on holiday will physically recharge you, but whatever is nibbling away at your peace of mind is still lurking here on your return.

So its best you start taking some time off right now *in your head*, and giving yourself some mental breathing space, regardless of what others want you to be, whether they be colleagues, friends or dare I say it, family.

By marwan, at May 7, 2007 at 7:42 PM
Dear Professor,
I hear you and I feel you.
This week has been traumatic for me, and I feel my sense of purpose drifting.
With a sick child in the house, I really dont know, when the ironing got done, or the food was cooked.
All I knew was antibiotic timings,thermometer and sponge baths.
In the middle of all this,an incident left me reeling. I have decided this week, to take some time out and blog purely on some thoughts.
I wish your soul peace, and that you find the direction that your being needs.
Know that you are not alone.

By *, at May 8, 2007 at 9:04 AM
DON'T DANCE SO FAST

Have you ever watched kids

On a merry-go-round?

Or listened to the rain

Slapping on the ground?

Ever followed a butterfly's erratic flight?

Or gazed at the sun into the fading night?

You better slow down.

Don't dance so fast.

Time is short.

The music won't last.

Do you run through each day

On the fly?

When you ask How are you?

Do you hear the reply?

When the day is done

Do you lie in your bed

With the next hundred chores

Running through your head?

You'd better slow down

Don't dance so fast.

Time is short.

The music won't last.

Ever told your child,

We'll do it tomorrow?

And in your haste,

Not see his sorrow?

Ever lost touch,

Let a good friendship die

Cause you never had time

To call and say,"Hi"

You'd better slow down.

Don't dance so fast.

Time is short.

The music won't last.

When you run so fast to get somewhere

You miss half the fun of getting there.

When you worry and hurry through your day,

It is like an unopened gift.... Thrown away.

Life is not a race.

Do take it slower

Hear the music

Before the song is over.

By Anonymous, at May 9, 2007 at 10:44 AM
Please, please, please take a break. This posting reads like something your friends and family don't want to be looking back at in hindsight.

By Anonymous, at May 11, 2007 at 8:05 AM
Mory

This happens to all of us. A break will give you a temporary rest, but when you get back it will all be waiting for you, again.

I think you handled all the electricity shite fairly well....and you held it together cos you HAD to. Now it is over, the reality has sunk in. Along with the move....it is all sinking in now...

Just remember that whatever you do today will not necessarily impact you for a while. So when you thought you were coping very well over the last few months, you were in fact building up to this explosion point. It is obvious from you past posts, you were holding yourself, staying calm....in control. You had to be then, now you don't.

Just make a list of all the big events in your life since Baby L was born.....and then you can go wow..I think your life over the last 13 months has been quite dramatic. Take a look and then realise how much you have been holding it all together.

You will be just fine Mr M. Now go into the kitchen and make a milkshake (dont forget to plonk a dollap of nutella in the blender with the ice cream & Milk)....sit back and reflect. Life is good.

By CG, at May 11, 2007 at 1:52 PM
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

Have a bepsi...dude !!!!

By Shankar Pandiath, at May 11, 2007 at 5:42 PM
You are not turning gay aren't you? lol

Mory, take a break, the Mrs. and Baby M deserve that.

RnD

By Unknown, at May 14, 2007 at 9:29 AM
I know exactly what you need...

You don't need a vacation...

You need to go back...To Kuwait!

By Anonymous, at May 16, 2007 at 3:28 PM
i know exactly what you feel. I guess its about getting your perspective on life in focus again.

Change can be a painful bitch, but if it is really what you want...it can pay off big time.

By One Nine Seven One, at May 20, 2007 at 1:50 PM
Everybody here has told you what you should do to catch happiness. What struck me about this post was the religious longing. I have been feeling the same and out of impulse, when I was at Mercato...I just rushed to the prayer room and prayed.

I'm still not regular. And today I was flipping channels and I stopped at one, where a a guy said that if we were feeling guilty about missing prayers and such, then in a way, Allah has sent us a signal to return. It's never too late M. You might just find more peace.

By flamin, at June 1, 2007 at 1:59 AM