Dubai Consumer Mirror

Saturday, January 27, 2007

Few changes

I am really sorry for not posting regularly. I am in the middle of moving houses now and going through the whole deal of looking for proper movers, settling bills, paperwork, taking measurements ... etc.

I switched to the not-so-new blogger version now. Nothing will change in the template or the overall appearance. The 'email notification' bit confused the hell out of me at the beginning, but it looks OK now.

There will be that TAGS thingy, which is cool, i guess.

I also decided to replace this blogger profile t-shirt photo

..with a REAL picture of yours truly.

Now, the reason behind this change is that I've received a number of observations on the old photo. Especially on what people thought or referred to as me having a big belly.

To set the record straight .. that ain't no big belly (kirsh) y'all!

Let me explain.
You see, the day I took that 'blogger photo on the peer', was a really windy one. And at the same exact moment the picture was snapped, a sudden and unexpected draft of wind created an air pocket that inflated my t-shirt and gave the visual illusion of a big belly. Hence, that belly you are seeing in da photo ain't the real deal.

for all ya ladies out there, this is how my stomach REALLY REALLY REALLY looks like

Okaaay fine .... i lied.
That was how I actually looked like about 10 years ago when I used to do 200 sit-ups at a 45 degree inclined bench every single day... (sigh)
What the hell happened?
Umm.. I moved to Dubai. Which was still OK btw.. But 3 year after that, I moved to Sharjah and that was the beginning of a whole new era of leading the most detrimental life style anyone can have.
Anyhow, and 5 years later, I am moving out of Sharjah back to Dubai again. I am already on a really good special diet system. The 4 hours I used to put in driving everyday, will be shifted to seeing more of the family, reading more and of course, hitting the gym like the good ol' days.
Wish me luck :)

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Thursday, January 25, 2007

Jobs In Dubai

I always get random emails from people living outside the UAE asking me whats the best way to find a JOB in Dubai. My advice is that the first step to land in a good job in Dubai is to actually (physically) be in dubai looking for your perfect job and employment.

Job hunters for jobs in dubai can always look at online job websites for jobs in Dubai. However, ITP -the region’s most respected technology publisher- believes that Online job hunters for jobs in dubai should be very careful..

Read more

(if you can't view the story, just do a quick registration on

Saturday, January 20, 2007


Image courtesy:

Just watched the first episode of Dirt... and MAN it sure is dirty. I am talking R Rated mature adult content kindda dirty.

The show is about a tabloid editor, Lucy Spiller (
Courteney Cox) and a schizo-photographer in the wacky world of Hollywood celebrity with all it's discontents. Lucy has the ability to turn any comment, look or gesture into a home wrecking, reputation killing, front-page news.

Her photographer, while trying to make sense of all the voices in his head, he recruits sources who feed the magazine with more dirt on anybody.

The first episode, like any other pilot, draws the main lines of the show's key characters. There is something that is dark and mysterious about the show. It reminded me of
Six Feet Under, in an odd sorta way.

Friday, January 19, 2007

What a week!

Sorry for being MIA for sometime… It has been another “one of those weeks” week. Everything was pouring in from everywhere!

So, what’s going on? Lets see..

At work: Don't you just hate it when you have those people who think they know everything about YOUR job, when the matter to the fact is, they know jack-shit about their own jobs. Then they have the nurve to come and lecture you about what THEY think you should or should not be doing. I've been having these guys over my head all week!

I swear, sometimes I feel I am completely surrounded by jackasses.

At home: right now, I am going the worst time any man living on this good land can go through. A man’s worst nightmare. The most dreadful decision anyone can take:
Moving Houses.

I've been looking at homes all week. Browing papers, website and making really obsucre phonecalls.

I need to find a place that’s closer to Jabal Ali Area. Anywhere on SZR, Barsha, Marina, close to Mall of The Emirates. I've been seeing homes all last week. Some pretty funny stories there.

To be honest, I really don't want to move out. I’ve just renewed my contact last December. But I NEED to move. And you know the differencing between wanting something and needing it.

Yes ladies and gents, I give up. I am throwing the towel on the floor. My five-year struggle with Dubai-Sharjah Highway traffic is coming to an end.

It’s not an entirely happy ending though. I mean, I really like it where I am. The house is very spacious; I am surrounded by everything I need. AND technically, its only a 20min drive away to work. Realistically, it takes me about 1.5 to 2 hrs to cover that 20 mins trip because of the all-year-round traffic jam festival.

Here is the irony though; After browsing a few houses, and by the looks of it, I will end up paying double what I am paying now, for a house that’s 1/2 the size.

That’s Dubai real-estate economics for you.

At the real world: Lots of things happened during this week. I was on Sheikh Zayed Road when the dreadful tower fire took place in Jumeirah lakes project thing. Dubai’s construction boom has claimed four more lives I am afraid. May god have mercy on their souls. What a disaster…

Oh, and Etisalat Internet access is till a joke. I have an ADSL 2mb package with an active connection of a 56kbps link!

At blog: Apparently, that last entry I did on Bruj Al Arabi was well received. Thanks for everyone who commented .. I cherish each and every one of it. Except for that ANON who gave me the if-you-don't-like-it-you-can-leave routine… dumbass.

With other bloggers: I really need to catch up on what’s happening around the place.

I should resume regular posting very soon...

Saturday, January 13, 2007

Sing along: this Burj is my Burj, That burj is your Burj ...

Almost everyone I spoke to over this weekend mentioned this "Burj Al Arabi" project thing. Bloggers talked about it, 7days took swings at this project-to-be for 2 days now.

Bottomline: everyone hates it!

But why? Is it really worse than the Big Ben replica tower on Sh. Zayed Road? Or the one that rotates? Or that falcon city of wonders with its not-so-original designs?

Not really!

My take on this is that the reason for this sever backlash is due to an extreme case of expat jealousy.

You see, we expats are the majority of the UAE population. We came to this great land and are actively contributing to its development and growth. Very few of us get recognised and we would like our fair share of this property bonanza.

So, if I were the developer of this oversized man-in-kandoura project, I would like to propose something to give some credit back to our hardworking expatriate community.

Maybe the following property concepts to be built somewhere in the vicinity of Burj Al Arabi:


Special facilities:
- Special pre-branded closets and storage compartments with brands such as Zara, River Island and Massimo Dutti and Fake AX, Fake CK and Fake Hugo Boss
- Centralized Hair Gel dispenser system with strong, extra strong and spiky strong options
- Extra ATMs to be activated end of every month to help pay off massive amount of credit card bills, car loans and personal loan
- Shuttle Bus services to all major Dubai clubbing spots available around the clock- All branches of coffee brands available at food court with door-to-door latte delivery
- In-house car mechanic that specialize in fixing 1980 to 1990 model BMWs only
- Every tenant receives 1 full shisha kit with personlised engraved pipe


Special facilities:
- Tower floors divided according to profession: Barber, laundry, Cafeteria, Office boy , illegal car lift driver, visa wrangler
- Inhouse training centre for special classes offered in
* Linguistics: Mastering AraHinEnglish (bas babe, no gerger kalam wajed)
* Physics: Advanced Carpooling 101 (Evasive maneuvers to conquer Dubai-Sharjah-Ajman Highway and detect/evade police patrols )
* Psychology: Get out of trouble by pretending not to understand anything said around you(Ana mafi Kalam Arabi)
- State-of-the-art bicycle parking and storage facility
- Each tenant to recieve free copy of the book "Satwa, The Hidden Treasures"


Special facilities:
- Maximum occupancy per tenant is 2 to 3 weeks only
- Central laundry for white linen garment washing only
- In house visa issue and typing centres
- Specialized Gold Souk at mezzanine floor with Russian speaking sales staff
- Door to door VISA renewal, cash delivery and transfer services available
- Instant service business centre for those last minute changes on fake business cards
- Free Copy of the best selling book "How to be deported from Dubai as Boris and comback as Evan"
- Each tenant to receive complete map and tour guide to Dubai hottest free-hold property developers and gold shops.


Special Facilities
- In House psychiatry clinics to resolve all your Dubai traffic trauma syndrome
- Never worry about not having the right change: Each housing unit has a centralized self replenishing automated money change maker thingi.
- All housing unit front doors are fixed with state of the art walk-in body and breath odor detector and to help decide if its time for a shower this month or not
- Print shop and emergency parking services available for those last minute demonstration needs
- Every tenant will get a free copy of “How to turn down those short Five- dirhams-only rides without getting reported to Arbab”


Special Facilities
- Maximum capacity allowed per room is 10 pax only
- Residents of this tower get mean and dirty looks from Jumeirah Janes no more with the in house shopping mall and supermarket
- Housing units are designed in a way that residents will able to actually cook, bathe and sleep in separate rooms
- Maximum bunk-bed height not to exceed 2 beds per wall
- Ample and convenient bus parking space available
- Special spaces and lots for non-paid demonstrations (available with disposable office equipment for trash purposes)

The Dresden Files

Here is a show that i will keep an eye on. Its been getting OK previews so far and from what i read about it, if you like CSI. Xfile and Heroes, this should be the show for you as. Based on Jim Butcher's novel series, the show is about a detective who tries to solve special cases with some pretty special skillz .

I am not talking about OCD-Monk-kindda skills here, but more scary dark supernatural stuff kindda skills.

Anyhow. the show should air next week (Jan 21st). I will let you know once I get to see it.

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

I need your help

If you have $5000 to spend on charity. What would you do?

Please bare in the mind that...

- I do NOT want to give it in CASH
- I do NOT want to give it in one of those blown up cheques
- I would like involve as many as possible from both sides (giver and receiver)
- It should have a helping, healing, feeding, pleasing, dressing, feeding, educating or cleaning nature or offering
- It should go to people who REALLY need help (orphans, patients, the elderly…etc)

and if possible..

- Would like the donation to have some kind of a lasting/sustainable effect; not a one-off thing.

Please do elaborate as much as you can.


There has been so much hype about this upcoming gizmo, check this dedicated iPhone blog where enthusiasts share their impressions of what the highly anticipated iPhone might look like..

Well, they have to waste time on Adobe CS no more,
because the real deal is here.

...Apple Computer Inc. Chief Executive Steve Jobs on Tuesday unveiled the iPhone, its new touch-screen mobile phone that will be able to play music, surf the Internet and take pictures, among other features.

Okay ..

The phone, to be available in June, will use new "multitouch" technology, Jobs added, calling the phone the "ultimate digital device." It will have a 3.5-inch diagonal screen and be 11.6 millimeters thick. Apple's iPod technology is built into the phone.

Among its features, Apple said that the phone will have a 2-megapixel camera, instant text-messaging capacity, sync with iTunes and use a visual voice-mail system, which will allow users to read a list of people who called.

I dont want to say that it sounds like a pimped out iPod with a GSM chip .... lets just wait and see.

UPDATE: check out some close-ups of the iPhone on Gizmodo

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Dream Ice Cream

Did you ever crave a certain ice cream flavor that no matter where you look, you just can't find anywhere?
Well guess what... Haagen Dazs if giving YOU the
chance to create your very own flavor.

Just out of curiosity, what would your special flavor be?

Monday, January 08, 2007

Du you have one of those?

Sunday, January 07, 2007

Media, Agencies and Clients - Unveiled

I haven't seen a more accurate manifestation of what happens inside those damn agencies walls… day in, day out!

The $1 million question is: Do you relate to this video?

If you don't; and you ARE in advertising/marketing/PR - then you are in the wrong business my friend..

Saturday, January 06, 2007

Quidam in Dubai

I watched Quidam today, Cirque du Soleil's first performance in Dubai; supposedly.

For starters, and unlike the TVC and the radio spots, this is NOT Cirque du Soleil first performance in the Middle East ever. ITP brought them about 4 or 5 years ago to one of its events. I think it was for The Arabian Business Awards.

It doesn't matter, at least they are here. It’s time now for my impressions.

There will be two types of people attending the Show. People who have been to previous Cirque Du Soleil shows; and people who have not – obviously.

If you belong to the group of people who attended previous shows, then don't expect much from the stage, the sound and the lightening effects. You see, one of the things that make Cirque Du Soleil such a fantastic show is the stage and everything related to it.

Compared to the shows
I attended in Vegas this summer, the stage they set up in Dubai can only be described as amateur-ish. Sound wasn’t that great and you can have better and more comfortable seats in the local Al Wasel football stadium, if you were ushered to the right seats in the first place that is - all that and we had VIP tickets!

Having said that, the best way to enjoy Quidam in Dubai is to isolate yourself from any element that is or can be attributed to a Dubai based organization such as event management, logistics, venue or pre-event preparations.

Forget all about the lousy seats, the random ushering (we -and several others- were usherd to the wrong seats at the begining) and the distorting noise levels from the huge AC compressors that killed those dreamly silent moments of the show.

Sit there and keep your hands on your thighs, because if you move them as much of an inch in the wrong direction and beyond the contour of your body outline, your hands will -most likely- end up on the shoulders of the person in front of you or on someone else's lap.

Isolate the noise of kids screaming, people side-talking, Pepsi cans popping, nacho crunching and cracking, candy plastic bag wrinkling and unwrapping, ketchup/mustard from hotdog sandwich squirting, mobile screen flashing, the occasional camera flash blinding AND the feet crushing and knee banging - courtesy of people constantly walking …

Isolate all that and focus on one thing: The show.

Brace yourself for a fantastic journey and a celebration of human capability that goes beyond your wildest imagination. If I ever wanted to run away and join the circus, it will be to join Cirque du Soleil.

The show is original, refreshing and rich with culture and authenticity - something that Dubai's leisure and entertainment business desperately needs.

I hope they are here to stay.

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Its just another day on Al Ittihad Highway

3:10 PM Accident on Al Ittihad highway - man was run over while trying to cross a 5 lane motorway. I feel bad for the driver.

3:15 PM - A rubber-necker rammed into the car infront of him, causing another accident on the other side of the same road.

3:25 PM - Anjad (Sharjah Police) dealing with two accidents, on both sides of the same street.

So, do you still wonder why we have too many accidents in this place?

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Page stats

One of Autoblog's posts yesterday was on its most visited page in 2006. The page was on a preview of the All New Chevrolet Camaro Concept. That page was visted a whooping 364,456 times! Oh and by the way, the car IS friggin awesome! Check out the gallery

Its a pain I can't get such stats from my free web-stat service. Maybe I'll sign up for a paid one this year... who knows.

One thing I am sure of though, from my daily visits to my visitor stats pages, I can easily assure to you that theee most visited page would be anything the results from search queries on Dubai Rent Committee; visitors are most likely to land
here, here or here.

Four or five daily hits -to say the least- are from Dubai based browsers, looking for more info on or how to contact Dubai Municipality’s Rent Committee.

Not as exciting as the Autoblog's Camaro post, but if that shows anything, it shows the severe degree of frustration we, the masses, have due to the absurd rent situation in this city!


Lets see..

7 days a week
7 wonders of the world
7 colors of the spectrum
7 music notes
7 seas
7days (the newspaper)
7 continents
7 up
se7en - the movie
Snow white and the 7 dwarfs...

There is a very long list about seven, the number on

Forget all that.

For everyone in Dubai today, this is the only 7 that matters

Monday, January 01, 2007

Its 2007... so?

My wife asked me this morning what am I gonna cover in my first post in 2007...

Simple question, but I didn't know what to answer.

I was thinking of going on and on about how 2006 was and how I plan to make things better for me in 2007...bla bla blaaaa.. bla bla ... but that would be too lame

I was thinking of doing a post on self proclaimed "best of the best of 2006 posts" on my blog .. but that'd be too uncreative - and borderline vain

I thought of talking about the ridiculous traffic condition of Dubai's streets and highways last night, the crazy-ass driving and the lack of parking spaces in most decent venues... but again, that’s how it is everyday, so where is the news..

I thought of whining about the absurdly expensive and poorly serviced "new year's eve" packages that were planned this (last) year, but that'd be too ... umm... Expat-ish

I thought about writing on Saddam's execution. But my emotions about that event are so mixed, the post would end up being be too confusing..

I thought about telling what I did last night, which was nothing (I was the only one online on my MSN messenger list), but again, that would be too boring ..

I guess, I have nothing to else to tell you but for 2007:

Be good
Give more than you can take
Remember God
Don't waste food
Treat everyone the way you want to be treated
Be polite when you are behind the driving wheel, you could be saving someone's life
Respect older people, even if you think you earn more than they do
Call your parents more; if you can't, then pray more for them

Happy 2007...